Comes in a digipak with artwork by Gabe Foreman. Actual human baby not included.
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ships out within 3 days
I remember back when I was in the womb
It felt like I was the first baby on the moon
Blood cells were the stars and the placenta was the earth
and I had amniotic fluid as my space food
and I made all kinds of plans for when I got out
the things I would do the things I’d talk about (when I learned to talk)
and for when I learned to walk I planned the places I would go to
like new Brunswick and the mall and the Toronto zoo.
And from the uterus I planned out the world I would create
I’d ride a scooter or a bus and I would go on dates
And in the evenings I’d stay in and concentrate
On drafting plans for my own benevolent state
Yes I wanted to see that new world
That big brown black green and blue world
I was getting bored with the small old world I was in
I wanted to make that new world
My world would be a place where everyone would play saxophones
But never soprano saxophones just tenors and baritones
And once in a trumpet and a rusty old French horn
Would play a solo and make us shake our little bones
I was an ambitious little unborn child
When the doctor did the ultrasound I winked and I smiled
Then I just relaxed and laid back for a while
I was patient cause that was kind of my style
But to be honest I was looking forward to getting out of there
And doing things like growing teeth and a bit of hair
But I was also thinking that the whole birth thing was unfair
Cause it would be over so quickly after so much time to prepare
And then I was finally born into the disease of the world
And so were thousands of other little boys and girls
And we shook our little fists at the sky and cried and hurled our insults
and our anger and took our flags and banners and unfurled them and they said:
“Take us back to the old world!
We don’t want this ugly new world!
We were much happier back then, and we want back in,
Take us back to the old world!”