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credits

released January 1, 2009

All songs by Mathias Kom. All rights reserved. Copyright 2009 SOCAN.

Recorded by Dave Trenaman and Colleen Collins at the Quarantine, Jon Wood and Brian Barr in Vancouver, and Andy Magoffin at the House of Miracles. Featuring Mathias Kom, Jill Staveley, Nick Ferrio, Mike Duguay, Jenny Gleeson, Jenny Mitchell, Darcy McCord, Jay Swinnerton, Aliya Dalfen, Adam DeMarsh, Dave Hartley, Steve McNabb and Charlie Glasspool. Guest vocals by Wax Mannequin and Otis Mr. Bones Magoffin. Cover art by Gabe Foreman, layout and design by Leigh Kotsilidis.

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The Burning Hell

The Burning Hell is the alter-ego of Canadian songwriter Mathias Kom, and consists of him plus Ariel Sharratt (clarinet), Nick Ferrio (bass), and Darren Browne (guitar).

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Track Name: Old World
I remember back when I was in the womb
It felt like I was the first baby on the moon
Blood cells were the stars and the placenta was the earth
and I had amniotic fluid as my space food

and I made all kinds of plans for when I got out
the things I would do the things I’d talk about (when I learned to talk)
and for when I learned to walk I planned the places I would go to
like new Brunswick and the mall and the Toronto zoo.

And from the uterus I planned out the world I would create
I’d ride a scooter or a bus and I would go on dates
And in the evenings I’d stay in and concentrate
On drafting plans for my own benevolent state

Yes I wanted to see that new world
That big brown black green and blue world
I was getting bored with the small old world I was in
I wanted to make that new world

My world would be a place where everyone would play saxophones
But never soprano saxophones just tenors and baritones
And once in a trumpet and a rusty old French horn
Would play a solo and make us shake our little bones

I was an ambitious little unborn child
When the doctor did the ultrasound I winked and I smiled
Then I just relaxed and laid back for a while
I was patient cause that was kind of my style

But to be honest I was looking forward to getting out of there
And doing things like growing teeth and a bit of hair
But I was also thinking that the whole birth thing was unfair
Cause it would be over so quickly after so much time to prepare

And then I was finally born into the disease of the world
And so were thousands of other little boys and girls
And we shook our little fists at the sky and cried and hurled our insults
and our anger and took our flags and banners and unfurled them and they said:

“Take us back to the old world!
We don’t want this ugly new world!
We were much happier back then, and we want back in,
Take us back to the old world!”
Track Name: Dancer/Romancer
From the smallest ant to the tallest tree
Everything has something in common with me
The baby ant starts as a gleam in the daddy ant eyes
And all the ants they are going to die

The tall tree only got tall by chance
Successfully competing with the other plants
Taking little plants’ water and little plants’ light
Avoiding the forest fires, the beetles and the chainsaw bite

We’re all line dancing in a furnace of sex and misfortune
And the fires are scorching, but if we keep dancing we will survive
We’re all romancing just as much as is romantically possible
As much as it costs it will all be worth it at the end of the night when we’re still alive

Look at the little baby with its little baby hands and eyes
Looking at the world with little baby surprise
Looking like a little baby you and me
Yet another little miracle of genetic potpourri

When the little baby plays in his little baby box of sand
Will he crush the little ants with his little hands
Will a lightning storm bring the tall tree crashing down
On the little sandbox and when it does, will there be a little sound
If there’s no-one around?

Keep dancing, dancers and keep romancing, romancers
I told you before, in a different song: that’s all you can do.
Track Name: Everybody Needs A Body (To Be Somebody)
I was out for a walk downtown last Saturday night
Coming back from a show or something like that
And I looked up at the sky and it was dark and covered with clouds
And I thought about how I needed to get some kind of job

And I thought about how living out of a van isn’t as romantic as it’s made out to be
Especially when the only one in the van is me
And I sat down on the curb and watched a squirrel get hit by a car
And I wondered where you are, whoever you are

Every bit of the body needs something to do
Every good album needs a slow song or two
So out with the adenoids and in with the ballads
Every future needs androids, every model needs salads

Well as I was sitting there looking from the dead squirrel to the distant taillights of the car that hit it
I thought about how if I did have a real job I’d probably last two weeks and then quit it
And I thought about how my van was pretty nice after all and since I was in my 30s now it seemed appropriate to be driving a minivan anyway
Even if I didn’t have an apartment or my own driveway

And then some university girls passed me on their way to 80s night and they were all wearing the same kind of pants
I was sitting on the curb so I didn’t notice their faces but they all seemed excited to dance
And I thought about how when I dance people often think I have some kind of rare syndrome or disease
So I don’t dance too often but I’d like to dance as often as I pleased

Cause every bit of the body needs something to do
Even agoraphobics need the occasional public rendezvous
You’ve got to keep dancing if you want to meet some kind of woman or some kind of man
And we’re all dancing as fast as we can

Everybody needs a body to be somebody
Everybody needs a body to be somebody….
Track Name: The Things That People Make, Pt. 2
Like the things we don’t have names for you’re the dirt that makes the ground
Like a broken vacuum cleaner you just push the dirt around
Oh let’s not fight we don’t have all night
You’re right, you be the bait, I’ll be the bite

You’ll be the dictator I’ll be the oppressed
You’ll be the third world and I’ll be the West
You’ll be the last giant panda bear I’ll be the last giant panda bear sperm
You’ll be the baby bird and I’ll be the regurgitated worms

You’ll be the shooter girl and I’ll be the bar
You’ll be the frat boy I’ll be the guitar
You’ll be the lost kid at the zoo I’ll be the ice cream on your chin
You’ll be the newborn baby looking for a way back in

Thank God that I’ve got the things that I’ve got
But a lot of things I’ve got are things I never knew I needed til
I met you and you taught me a thing or two about things
Things like love and buildings, things like death and happy birthday cake
Things like how to give and never take
Things like the things that people make

You’ll be construction and I’ll be destruction
You’ll be the worker I’ll be the means of production
You’ll be the leftist student punk I’ll be the accountant you’ll become
You’ll be the minivan I’ll be the jeans you think make you look young

Thank God that I’ve got the things that I’ve got
But a lot of things I’ve got are things I never knew I needed til
I met you and you taught me a thing or two about things
Things like love and buildings, things like death and happy birthday cake
Things like how to give and never take
Things like the things that people make
Track Name: Grave Situation Pt. 3 (feat. Wax Mannequin)
A man loved a man who loved a woman who loved another man
All four of them made a plan to go to a music show
Wax Mannequin, he played The Price, the crowd went wild, he played it twice
They danced and sang until he stopped and then they shouted no

Play on play on but Wax was gone the crowd grew angry and with their drawn
and deadly fists and muscled wrists they tore each other into bits
And the man, the man the lady and the other man they turned and ran
Through flying kicks and pointed sticks and the gnashing teeth of angry kids

Man number one he made it and the lady made it too
But bits of flesh were all they left behind of man number four and number two
And when lady and man one were done with crying tears for everyone
They planned to leave the living land for the palace of the damned

Man one who loved no ladies bought an expensive black Mercedes
And drove it to the funeral and then drove it off a cliff
And the lady who loved the final man tied a belt onto a ceiling fan
And swung from it until the neighbors found her cold and stiff

And now all three men and lady have made the trip to Hades
Their love burns the hottest fires to ash and sends the demons panicking
And from the flaming rivers leaping fish made out of cinders
Splash and dance a fishy dance to the singing of Wax Mannequin
Track Name: Precious Island
Some sailors say they sail for several years and seldom see the sand at all
Oh I know that must be kind of dull
The sea’s a salty slippery friend it smells like fish and death and never ends
Oh you know this life is kind of dull

All we do is sail around for miles and miles and
All we want is a bit of dirt and sand
A little precious island

Precious island, precious island
When all the world is wet you bet we get a little funny in the head
And we don’t care if it’s Hamilton or somewhere with better hotels like maybe Thailand
Everything that’s not the sea
Is a little precious island to me

All we do is sail around for miles and miles and
All we want is a bit of dirt and sand
A little precious island
Precious island, precious island
When all the world is wet you bet we get a little funny in the head
And we don’t care if it’s Oshawa or somewhere with fewer trucks like the Scottish Highlands
Everything that’s not the sea
Is a little precious island to me

There’s a thousand reasons to hate the water
Unless you are a killer whale, a squid or a sea otter

You need a precious island, precious island
When all the world is wet you bet we get a little funny in the head
And we don’t care if it’s Pickering or somewhere where the cows are loud and the malls are silent
Everything that’s not the sea
Is a little precious island to me
Track Name: Animal Hides
Hello birds in the bushes, hello cows in the sheds
Hello fish in the rivers, crayfish in river beds
The students say we can learn something from you
And for once what the students say is true

Every animal has seen an animal die
And every animal needs somewhere to hide

The flood has been coming since the idea began
The hunter’s right behind you so hide if you can
Watch out for meteors be careful with knives
When you run you should run for your lives

God help you if you are alone
God help you if you are alone
If they said he’d help you, they lied
Every animal needs somewhere to hide
Track Name: The Berlin Conference
Why have I called you here? I guess I’ve got a thing for meetings
But please, take a chair, let’s get past the formal greetings
It’s so cold outside, let’s ponder wandering the tropics
And get to work tabling the topics that we’re here to discuss
Disgust runs through my northern veins when I consider what we’re wasting
think of the southern gains we could all be tasting
speaking of taste, waiter, another gin and tonic
Don’t look at me that way, Teutonic thirst is chronic and this is thirsty work.

Let’s not be gentle, gentleman, this project’s continental
Oh, don’t worry about that spill, friend, the tablecloths are rentals
Pass me the map and the brandy, I’ve got a pen already
Where’s the ruler? Where’s the compass? Ready, hold it steady…now, will you look at that!
Some call us rivals, they say we’ve got interests not friends
Well you say tomato, and I say dividends
Divided we stand but united we’ll do business
is this civilized or what? Can I get a witness, let’s sign this and light a cigar!

Oh, far be it for me to presume or decide
I just called the meeting I’m not taking sides
Side of beef? Cider? More port or maybe champagne
from the cellar, oh waiter we’ll need you again
It’s best to be under the influence, oh
When deciding our spheres of influence, no
Scrambling’s for eggs not for colonization
Sit settle down just relax and be patient
Here is a piece of the pie for you, and here is a piece of the pie for you too
And for you, no pie, after all you came late! Do you ask for a kiss on the very first date
So lodge a complaint, it’s a hodgepodge a paint by numbers call it whatever you want
But let’s focus on finding a final agreement, OK? I’m too drunk to think any more and I say

50 is the magic number, wormless are the birds who slumber
in three months we’ll do it let’s begin